the big, bad tube living in our homes

Once upon a time, I used to be quite the TV addict. And since I was the impatient sort who could never wait to see what was gonna happen next in a particular television drama, I usually would end up watching my DVDs all night long. Right now, I've moved on and become addicted to the Internet. Ah wells.

Anyway, I guess I do relate to the idea that television promotes distorted views of life. The truth is that most television dramas tend to overdramatize situations, violence for one, as well as form unrealistic expectations of beauty and relationships. Television dramas such as the OC, 90210, Greek and Gossip Girl make teenagers all over America strive for the kind of unattainable perfection you can only see in the media, whereas dramas such as CSI, Criminal Minds and Bones makes you more wary of the people around you and gives you the impression that the crime rate is higher than it really is.

My concern is really about a hot favourite channel of teens - MTV. It's strange how overly sexualized MTV has become nowadays. They seem to portray a certain kind of lifestyle in their music videos and the reality shows that they produce such as The Hills and Laguna Beach.

What I've gathered from watching certain rap videos is firstly, it is cool to club all the time, secondly, guys who have rad dance moves are automatically chick magnets and thirdly, there are almost always multiple women surrounding a guy in a rap music video. For some reason, females aren't appalled by how sexist they are being portrayed; instead, they indirectly encourage the stereotyping.

The same goes for MTV reality shows; it has become the IN thing right now to be head to toe decked in branded goods and to be a 'fashionista' and work in the high fashion industry ala Lauren Conrad on the Hills. Because of television shows like that, our views and perceptions become extremely warped. Even people our age can be easily affected by all the glitz and the glamour portrayed on television, let alone the young and susceptible teenagers who are exposed to MTV.

Well, it definitely seems as though kids nowadays are all starting to watch MTV at a younger and younger age. Look at the influx of teen idols popping up recently - Miley Cyrus, the Jonas Brothers. Their fan base are as young as 6 years old! Watching Disney channel is one thing, it's another thing to accidentally expose your kid to the content featured in MTV nowadays while trying to find a music program for he/she to watch.

Ultimately, television is just another form of entertainment. I think that it's fine for kids to watch it, as long as they stick within the right channels for their age groups. With the right parental guidance and information, I believe that we all aren't that affected by television afterall.

my self & my mum

So I was contemplating on what to blog about this time round and I started flipping through the text and came upon the 'Symbolic Interaction' theory. I thought that theory made a lot of sense, Mead's idea of the Mind and Self definitely applies to our life.

Take for example my relationship with my mum.

The both of us have always been close - in the 'go shopping, have dinner together, communicate and not fight' kinda way but definitely not best friends like how Rory and Lorelai are in the TV show Gilmore Girls. We talk about general stuff but never about deeper issues. However, she is very supportive of everything I do and never discourages me over anything. Whether it comes to grades or the tattoo that I chose to get last year, she never tells me that she is ashamed of me. I feel quite blessed in that aspect.


Even if I don't score well in my studies, she always tells me that it's alright as long as I've done my best. And that helped greatly in shaping the 'self' aspect of me. She never ever puts any unnecessary pressure on me and because of that, I've learnt to be independent, self-sufficient and motivated in my studies. Because she doesn't push me, I become even more determined to do well and get more A's.

In a way, it's also a self-fulfilling prophecy because of the fact that my mum always believed that I can succeed. Back when I was struggling like hell for my O'Level exams and everyone around me has all given up hope on me, she was the one who believed that I could do well as long as I did my best. Thus, I pushed myself extremely hard so as to show my mum that I fully appreciated how she was always there for me during that tough period and supported me all the way and I made it successfully through the O's. I even managed to get into the course of my choice! Her perspective of me mattered the most to me and because of her encouragement, I've been shaped into the person I am today.

For that, I will always be grateful.

I've seen how other parents can be like and I've also witnessed my friends getting all stressed out and discouraged by their parents' negative comments. I feel extremely blessed to have a mother who is so supportive and I will try my best to be a better daughter towards her.

the sound of silence

Sometimes I wonder if I'm truly introverted or do I simply choose to be because I'm too scared to put myself out there. I've always been considered as "the quiet one" and the "listener" among my group of friends as I have a tendency to shut off sometimes and just let my mind wander off. When that happens, my friends tease me and say that I've "gone into my little bubble" again. Yep, I do tend to deal with intrapersonal communication the best. See, dialogues with myself doesn't garner any form of judgment so that fact comforts me a little.

But yes, it really bothers me when I realise that something always tends to hold me back when it comes to speaking up and sharing my thoughts. Group communication is probably the hardest for me as I end up worrying about saying the wrong thing or boring everyone in my group. It took me quite a while to get comfortable with my current group of friends in UB and become confident enough to actually express my thoughts and feelings. Right now, I'm definitely much better at group communication with them; however, the interpersonal aspect of communication is still not quite there yet.

Whenever I feel down, they always seem to sense it; I have no idea if my face is an open book or they are just amazingly astute, and they always express concern for me and ask if I want to talk about it. My usual response to them is a tiny smile and an assurance that I'm fine just so that I don't have to talk about it. Despite their constant reassurances that they are always there if I need to talk, I somehow can't seem to bring myself to talk about my problems or feelings with many people. Even telling my closest and oldest friends can prove to be quite challenging for me let alone a group of my schoolmates whom I've only known for about a year, give or take?

I'm most comfortable with penning (typing?) down my thoughts in a journal. Well, at least I still have a regular outlet for me to vent. One of my friends did warn me that one day I'll most probably just explode with all the pent up feelings cooped up inside of me.

Failure in communication has not only rendered me unable to talk about my problems, it has also caused quite a few misunderstandings in some of my friendships. This is definitely unhealthy and I know that I should really learn how to open up and let others in. More positive self-talk would probably help me to sort my feelings and thoughts so that I am able to gain more confidence in communicating them to others. Well, my fear of expressing thoughts has led to one good thing; that is controlling the impulse to run my mouth off at anyone who annoys me. There has been more than one instance when I really felt like lashing out at certain people when they say or do something to tick me off, but manage to control myself thanks to my internal monologues who tell me to calm down and remind me that retorting back in a fit of anger will only cause more damage.


All in all, communication is something that everyone ought to learn to do effectively not just in resolving conflicts or talking about one's problems, but also in everyday life. Afterall, relationships can only be built and stay strong through good communication.